Picky Grouchy Non-Cook FAQs and Not so FAQs

IS A RAW FOOD DIET A GOOD
OPTION FOR THE NON-COOK?

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This is a question non-cooks of a certain bent may find themselves asking, hoping that words will somehow solve the problem of eating. As in, raw is the opposite of cook, and I am not one for cooking, so the raw food diet will come to the rescue!  Unfortunately, there's a big difference between  a raw food diet and willy nilly eating uncooked food without a thought except that at least you didn't have to cook it.  What they mean by raw, it turns out, is a complex, carefully considered and constructed system of food preparation, and food preparation, sorry to say, is cooking.

So much for raw food and the average non-cook.

If the non-cook would like to attempt to substitute language for cooking, she's better off taking real action, like getting into pickles, stirring the pot, learning which side her bred is buttered on, and taking things with a grain of salt. She can also take to  stewing over things, like a human crock pot.  Be the cooking? If she's the type to get frustrated -- the type to get to her boiling point -- there's always putting it on the back burner.

If fully none of these actions provide a satisfying substitution for cooking,  peppering her conversation with cooking related expressions might do the trick, until the point when the proof is in the pudding (there's no pudding), her goose is cooked (the oven was never even turned on), and she can only eat her words.